coluring:

if you tell me to calm down when i’m calm i’ll get really mad

supermoclel:

are you ever in the middle of saying something or showing someone something and you realize that literally no one cares 

roommate requirements

  • willing to reenact the ‘where’s my supersuit’ scene from the incredibles with me at any point in time

turkey-imported-from-maine:

firelorcl:

meladoodle:

i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed

a dentist

i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police

bigrnac:

“everyone has their off days” I tell myself 15 days in a row

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

houston i have so many problems

leopard-cub:

tumblr literally defies all things i’ve been taught:

  • don’t talk to strangers
  • don’t make friends online
  • don’t do anything stupid

sloth-grunge:

becoming self aware of your breathing and blinking is the worst thing

trash-king:

ppl changing their icons and urls at the same time

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a special message for a very special someone

averypottermormon:

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hey

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you

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dont you dare think

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for even a second

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that nobody saw you

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when you decided this waS AN ACCEPTABLE WAY TO PARK YOUR VEHICLE BECAUSE I SAW IT OKAY I FUCKING SAW IT YOUR CRAPPY PARKING JOB IS ON GOOGLE MAPS IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE WORLD

how did you find this